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Dear Felicia

December 18, 2019 By whvoice

Before we git onto the pre-Christmas gift list to the politicos around town. Cobina has to correct something. Last week, yores truly said one Andrea Tallamelli was chairman o’ the Bored of Ed. It is, in fact, Cebi Waterfield. Cobina made a mistake in what she hoid when she was told that said Tallamelli was being considered one of the contenders. We got it wrong, and we’re correcting it.

Of course, the Society for the Perpetually Enraged, otherwise known as the social media crowd went bonkers, and had some cherce things to say. Hey, I got it wrong. The only thing Cobina took umbrage to was some yahoo calling and saying we were like CNN. Nope. The difference betwixt us and CNN? We correct our mistakes, they just do rewrites.

~~~

As is the custom in our last isshew of the year, Cobina makes a list of gifts she thinks should be under the trees of local politicos and celebs. She’s been makin’ a list, just like the Jolly Ole Elf, and makin’ sure things are right.

Mayor Nancy Rossi – Herronner has two things under the tree this year. The first is an abacus so she can bring it to the opening meetings of the Finance Commission and begin the budget process. With the computers going down on occasion in the Actors Colony, she’ll need it. Second under the tree will be an Erector set. She can build all the projecks that seem to be stalled around the berg.

City Council Chairman Ron Quagliani – We’re gonna give the council chief some coloring books and crayons with the hope that he clears out a space in the caucus room next to the council chambers and gives the members a “time out” effen they get outta hand.

New members of the Council in general, and Democratic new members in particular – A year’s supply of their favorite headache medicine. They will need it to survive the palaver and the late nights.

GOP Council members Colleen O’Connor and Barry Cohen – Matching “I’m with Her/Him” t-shirts. Just to remind the council a GOP motion can now be seconded and discussed.

Democratic Town Committee Chairman and City Treasurer Mike Last – A framed quotation: Sic transit Gloria mundi (Thus passes is the glory of the World). It is what they used to tell Roman emperors. Last ain’t an emperor, but he is on top o’ the party heap right now. The way things go around here, that could change on a dime.

Republican Town Committee Chairman Pat Libero – A sewing kit. She’s going to need one to close up the fissures in the party after the last election.

Chairman of the Charter Revision Committee Ed Granfield – Pruning shears to cut through the red tape that might come his way leading up to the charter vote.

Majority leader of the Charter Commission John Carrano – A glossary of legal terms so the barristers don’t try to dazzle with bovine fertilizer.

Ed O’Brien and Deborah Collins, losing Dems in the last election cycle – A list of all the people who said they voted for them. We’re sure it’s gonna come out larger than the actual number that did.

GOP mayoral candidate Michele Gregorio – More business success. The best revenge is living well.

The Municipal Accountability Review Board – Each member will get a vintage recording of ‘Yakkitty Yak, Don’t talk back.” That’s the way they conduct their business with our officials.

The WHHS Building Committee – A gold-framed copy of the American Federation of Teachers report on air quality in the new building. It was a stunner.

Superintendent of Schools Neil Cavallaro – An uptick in city reading and math scores.

BOE Chairman Cebi Waterfield – A copy of Roberts Rules of Order, also the whip and chair that we gave Ron Quagliani last year…just in case things get boisterous.

Democratic Sen. Richard Blumenthal – New running shoes so he can get in front of those cameras faster.

Democratic Sen. Chris Murphy – An original idea. I don’t think he’s ever had one.

Third District Congresswoman Rosa DeLauro Greenberg – A “Where’s Waldo” game. Rosa has been conspicuously absent from the cameras recently. One wonders if her time as a big voice in the fortunes of the majority party are gone now that the “Squad” has taken over.

General Assembly majority leader Martin Looney – A tax he doesn’t like. We haven’t found one yet, but we’re going to continue to try right up to the big day.

Reps. Dorina Borer (D-115) and Mike DiMassa – The chutzpah to vote against one o’ Martin Looney’s tax proposals…just once.

Rep. Charles Ferraro (R-117) – A resole of his best shoes. He will be targeted once again by the Dems, looking to flip that seat. He’s one by going door-to-door, and he’ll probably have to do that again.

Voice Publisher Ken Carney – A 1929 Underwood typewriter like our editor has. Nothing like getting your hands inky when you’re trying to type.

Voice Reporter Josh LaBella – A list of profiles for 2020. It’s not as easy as you think.

Voice Director of Advertising Alan Olenick – A big contract that will put the publication on the map.

Columnists Eleanore Turkington and Dan Shine – Those special things they told the Jolly Ole Elf they wanted this year.

Photog Russ McCreven – An album of some of his greatest shots.

Editor Bill Riccio, Jr. – Those Lionel engines he has his eye on.

To all our readers – The best of holiday seasons. Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah!

Filed Under: 121919, Column, Dear Felicia

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